Hopes & Dreams; Poetry & Prose

Ok, I admit it... I love pretty much anything to do with weddings. Especially when it comes to the decor. So I've been perusing this website (from a company in Kelowna), and decided to post some of my favourite cake toppers.
All captions will be linked.

"Geek" Groom Mix & Match Cake Topper

"Picture Perfect" Couple Figurine

Cheeky Couple Figurine "My Main Squeeze"

"The Love Pinch" Bridal Couple Figurine

Princess Bride Kissing Frog Prince Figurine

"Almost Perfect . . . Frog Prince" Groom Figurine

True Romance Couple Figurine

Whimsical Sitting Bride and Groom

Showered with Love Couple Figurine

"Still in Love" Mature Couple Figurine

And there you have it. Just some of the many cake toppers from Exquisite Events & Accessories.

A few of my favourite things...

2011-05-20T00:52:00.000-07:00

On BHLDN

Little Leaf Placeholders

(I think these would be adorable on the tables.

Maybe I could make something that looked more real)

Glass Swallow Confection Jars

(These would be great if you wanted candy as your favours)

Crinkle Fans

(A nice idea if you're having an outdoor wedding.

Helps the guests stay cool, and could double as

a wedding favour.)

Sweets For Your Sweet Bag

(Again goes with the 'candy for favours' idea)

Sliced Vine Lanterns

(Wouldn't these look darling hanging from tree branches for an

outdoor wedding?)

Giving Tree Votive

(A bunch of these of differing heights would look gorgeous

as centrepieces on the tables with some foliage around them)

Offshoot Cake Server

(Sweet little twiggy cake server - I love outdoor themed decor!)

Just that kind of day...

2011-05-16T16:49:00.000-07:00

Its a drowsy, lazy, cloudy, rainy day today. Chilly and dark, its a good day for snuggling down by the fireplace with a cuppa tea and a good fantasy book. Although there is nothing like the feeling of the sun warming your shoulders and face while you're doing stuff outside, I absolutely love days like this. So peaceful and sleepy...
And inside the house is as peaceful as outside right now. Dinner is on the stove, dessert's in the oven, there's peaceful music in the background, and the exotic aroma of a pineapple scented candle is wafting gently into my nostrils.
Though its Monday, I've had the day off and it feels more like a Sunday. The house has been full this weekend, as my dad's brother and sister have come to visit. Its been so lovely to spend time with them and show them around a bit. The weekend has positively flown by, as weekends are always so apt to do, and though it is Monday, it feels like I've only had one day off. Oh well, such is life - busy but good. Good, sometimes only because God is good. But good none the less.
With tea in hand, music in ear, and dreams in heart, I'm off to see what the future holds.

La'el

Spring is in the air...

2011-03-04T16:40:00.000-08:00

...At least in the stores. Outside, the sky is cloudy, the snow is piled high and grungy looking (though it is melting slowly), the streets are filthy and wet, the trees are bare and looking like they were wishing for warmer weather (ever think that its kinda weird that when the air gets cold all the animals (and humans) get thicker coats, but the trees shed their leaves?) and its not very warm yet (though it isn't super cold either). All in all, its dismal, gray, dirty, and kinda dead outside.
The mall on the other hand, is full of racks of clothing in bright colours, Easter bunnies and eggs decorated in pastels, little skirts with flowers on them, sandals, beachy smelling perfumes... Its kinda beautiful, if only for the fact that it means that spring must come, and it must come soon!
Sometimes its such a welcome change to just leave the house, go to the mall where there aren't any windows, and walk. And browse. To just take in all the general springiness, and try to convince yourself that soon the sun will shine, the rain will fall, the birds will sing, and the world will come alive again.

Beth

Stick Together (Song)

2011-02-13T00:49:00.000-08:00

Here's a song I wrote on my ukulele at the start of the year...

Stick Together

He said, ‘Girl, the way that you smile that smile,

Well girl, you just about drive me wild.

And girl, the sparkle that lights your eyes,

It keeps me awake all night

Thinkin’ ‘bout you and the way

That you make me feel inside

‘Cause one look at you and I know

We’ll always be alright

We’ll stick together like paper and glue

I wanna stay here forever with you

Whatever comes are way, baby

We’ll see it through

‘Cause we go together like good food and wine

Whatever the weather we’ll be just fine

I’m yours forever and darling, you are mine’

She said, ‘Boy, the way that you hold me tight,

Well I feel I could dance all night.

And boy, your love for me shines so bright,

That boy, it fills me with pure delight

To just think about you and the way

You make me feel inside

‘Cause one look at you and I know

We’ll always be alright

We’ll stick together like paper and glue

I wanna stay here forever with you

Whatever comes are way, baby

We’ll see it through

‘Cause we go together like good food and wine

Whatever the weather we’ll be just fine

I’m yours forever and darling, you are mine’

Written by Beth Dyck January 8th, 2011

Brrrr!

2010-11-23T13:23:00.000-08:00

Its cold out. I mean really cold! Since when does the Okanagan sport temperatures of -13c and colder? If I close my eyes and point my face towards the window, its easy enough to imagine that its a nice warm, sunny day. But then my eyes pop open, and there on the ground, on the trees, on the houses and cars, is snow. Quite a bit of it too for this time of year.

Not that I'm complaining (much). Snow's beautiful. Its the cold that gets me. I HATE the cold. I think I was born in the wrong country. I get cold around mid October, and don't thaw out till late March or so. Whenever cold and snow hit, I feel like this little tree; just not ready!

Whenever snow hits, I get this intense and inexplicable yearning to go someplace warm; someplace where I can go lay on a beach in the sun, or at least walk around outside without a jacket on. Ah well, If it didn't get cold out, there would never be a cozy fire in our fireplace...

Here's the view out my bedroom window...

Beth

Its raining....

2010-10-25T16:46:00.000-07:00

The rain is falling gently from the water-laden clouds hovering just above my head. The misty drops caress the red, yellow and brown leaves preparing for the last step of a year-long cycle.
The clouds, with their heavy burden of wetness are sinking lower and lower, and coming to rest on the tops of the mountains, obscuring them in a fluffy blanket of white and gray. A high-blowing breeze makes them creep along the treetops lethargically, as if they just want to sit and doze for a while but are unable to refrain from carrying on.
There is a chill in the autumn air. All around me, smoke drifts lazily from chimneys and mixes with the low clouds. The aroma of wood fires mingles with the freshness in the air.
Soft, peaceful music drifts towards my ears and through my soul. Its a beautiful day!

Bethelie

I love the rain! Give me a wet, melancholy, sleepy day over sun anytime! Well, most anytime. I do love the beach too! But if its going to be cool and cloudy, it might as well be raining.

Pink and sweet... First cake attempt

2010-10-25T12:25:00.000-07:00

Well, its not perfect, but its better than it would be if it wasn't at all...
This is my first attempt at making a cake that's more than just a round or rectangular cake. Its supposed to be a hand bag for Eden's birthday. I guess I'm fairly satisfied with it, and I'm pretty sure Eden will like it, so that's all that matters right now.

I iced and began decorating it last night. If I had known that the blue m&ms would melt and get blue dye dripping down the pink icing, I would've waited till today to do that part. So I had some patching up to do. But now I know for next time.

Beth

Meaningless...?

2010-10-23T01:23:00.000-07:00

"All is meaningless," says the Teacher, "utterly meaningless."
Ecclesiastes 12:9

Sometimes (for me at least) life feels that way; meaningless. I don't know my purpose and calling here on earth. I feel so restless and unfulfilled. What's the point of dreams if there's no way they'll ever come true? What's the point of dreaming if you must wake again to the monotony of reality? What am I here for? How can I prepare for the future if I have no clue whatsoever What I may be doing in the next year/decade...?

I'm tired of being bored.
I'm tired of having dreams that I can't turn into goals.
I'm tired of not knowing what I want to do with my life.
I'm tired of being alone.
I'm tired of monotony.
I'm tired of wanting the impossible.
I'm tired of feeling like I'm missing out on life.
I'm tired of feeling restless.
I'm tired of feeling unfulfilled.
I'm tired of being so busy and filling my life with things that don't make me feel better, but just distract me for the moment.
I'm tired of complaining about how I'm feeling.
So I'm done.
I don't have a solution to my problems, but my God does.
Maybe I should start seeking Him to fill the void inside of me instead of trying to fill it with all that is meaningless.
I tend to get so caught up in the way I feel and my 'problems' that I forget to keep my eyes on the One who put me on this earth and gave me a purpose. The One who is calling me to greatness.
Perhaps its time for some repentance and a change of perspective.
Maybe everything's not so meaningless after all...

"Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved priviledge where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God's glory."
Romans 5:2

"No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead."
Philippians 3:13

"But we are looking forward to the new heavens and new earth he has promised, a world filled with God's righteousness."
2 Peter 3:13

"For this world is not our permanent home; we are looking forward to a home yet to come."
Hebrews 13:14

Beth

P.S. It's truly amazing how just writing this out totally changed my mood from being mopish and depressed to feeling hope and looking forward to tomorrow (or I guess later today...)

Bolding Meme

2010-10-02T19:44:00.000-07:00

I don't usually do these things, but I'd never seen this one before, and I was bored.
Everything in bold type applies to me.

I AM: happy. sad. a good friend. adventurous. shy. confident. procrastinating. a male. bored. anxious. clumsy. sociable. always punctual. selfish. intelligent. funny. a female. sarcastic. insecure. sick. beautiful. articulate. loud. kind. even tempered. honest. short. tall. medium height. proud of myself. loving. witty. down to earth. outspoken. determined. high maintenance. pretty. assertive. organized. selfless.

I HAVE: brown hair. blue eyes. curly hair. long fingernails. curves. braces. chipped nail polish. long legs. straight hair. a fringe. long eyelashes. sore feet. dark skin. green eyes. blonde hair. dyed hair. red hair. short legs. big boobs. rosy cheeks. wavy hair. black hair. a small waist. piercings. tattoos. big ears. short hair. brown eyes.

I LOVE: babies. flowers. summer. coffee. the rain. candles. incense. late night talk shows. insects. hugs. attention. the beach.chocolate. music. hats. harry potter. twilight. facebook. black and white photos. sleeping in. driving. narrating my pet’s thoughts. opening gifts. buying gifts. halloween. cute texts. apples. compliments. country music. hip hop. sushi. sports. art. singing. seeing my loved ones happy. surprises. sunsets and sunrises. horror movies. simon cowell. family guy. garlic. hearing somebody talk in their sleep. being right. kfc. abstract photography. concerts and festivals. tanning. over sized t-shirts.

I WOULD LOVE TO BE A: police officer. lawyer. doctor. teacher. fruit picker. mother. greenpeace volunteer. hippie. groupie. rockstar. footballer’s wife. therapist. singer. actress. diving instructor. lottery winner. company owner. housewife. nurse. builder. race car driver. website developer. an inspirational talker. music teacher. artist. chef. makeup artist. hairdresser. restaurant owner. homeless shelter volunteer. fitness trainer. vet. radio show host. band manager. fashion designer. producer. sound engineer

I LIKE TO EAT: fruit. vegetables. fast food. sushi. in bed. rice. sandwiches. subway. chicken. cakes. cookies. seafood. a lot. pasta. rice crackers. when i’m bored. cheese. ice cream. lunch. garlic bread. peanut butter out of the jar. eggs. lots of ethnic foods. pancakes. honey. bread crusts. low calorie foods. soy products. gluten free products. only when i’m hungry. toast .breakfast. pizza. chocolate. candy. perogies.

I DISLIKE: cold mornings. baths. people dissing my taste in music. people in front of me walking really slowly. having my personal space invaded. cleaning. going to bed early. wine/beer. religion arguments. coffee. the beach. rain. children. drama. gossiping. hip hop. cooking shows. drugs. cats. people singing happy birthday to me. school. selfish people. social networking sites. swimming. snow. eminem. seafood. one word text messages. awkward silences. alarm clocks.

I LIKE: Reading. Writing. The Beatles. True Blood. Demi Lovato. Miley Cyrus. Selena Gomez. Taylor Swift. Knitting. Crafts. Perez Hilton. Tea. Cats. Twitter. Cold weather. Tofu. Hummus. Adam Lambert. Muse. The Killers. Jay Leno. Conan O’Brien. Craig Ferguson. PCs. Macs. John Lennon. Jennifer Aniston. LOST. Marriage Equality. Michael Buble. Poetry. Yoga. Crocs. Peace. My hometown. Proper spelling. Proper grammar. Disney. Saturday Night Live. Stem Cell Research. Green movement. Adopting animals. Vegetarianism/Veganism. Jimmy Fallon. Learning new languages. David Bowie. Snow. Horror books. Fantasy books. Disney Channel Shows. Being pale.

I am a cuddler. I am a morning person. I am an only child. I am currently in my pajamas. I am currently pregnant. I am currently single. I am currently suffering from a broken heart. I am left handed. I am married. I am addicted to my MySpace. I am online 24/7, even as an away message. I am a little shy around the opposite gender at first. I bite my nails. I can be paranoid at times. I don’t like anyone. I enjoy country music. I enjoy jazz music. I enjoy smoothies. I enjoy talking on the phone. I have a car. I have/had a hard time paying attention at school. I have a hidden talent. I have a pet. I have a tendency to fall for the “wrong” guy/girl. I have all my grandparents. I have been to another country. I have been told that I have an unusual sense of humor. I have or had broken a bone. I have caller I.D. on my phone. I have bathed someone. I have changed a diaper. I have changed a lot over the past year. I have done something illegal. I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color. I have had major/minor surgery. I have killed another person. I have had my hair cut within the last week. I have mood swings. I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. I have seen the television show The O.C. I have seen The Lord of the Rings trilogy. I like the taste of blood. I love Michael Jackson. I love sleeping. I love to play computer games. I love to shop. I own 100 CDs or more. I own and use a library card. I read books for pleasure in my spare time. I sleep a lot during the day. I strongly dislike math. I watch soap operas on a regular basis. I work at a job that I enjoy. I would classify myself as ghetto. I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free. I am currently wearing socks. I am tired. I love to paint/draw/sketch/sculpt.

I have/had: Graduated high school. Rode every ride at an amusement park. Collected something really stupid. Gone to a rock concert. Helped someone. Gone fishing. Spun turn tables. Watched four movies in one night. Been dumped. Failed a class. Dealt drugs. Taken a college level course. Been in a car accident. Been in a tornado. Done hard drugs (i.e. ecstasy, heroin, crack, meth, acid). Watched someone die. Been to a funeral. Burned myself. Ran a marathon. Your parents got divorced. Cried yourself to sleep. Cheated on someone. Been cheated on. Written a 10 page letter. Gone skiing. Been sailing. Had a best friend. Lost someone you loved. Shoplifted something. Been to jail. Had detention. Skipped school. Got in trouble for something you didn’t do. Stolen books from the library. Gone to a different country. Been in a mental hospital.Watched the “Harry Potter” movies. Fired a gun. Gambled in a casino. Had a yard sale. And a lemonade stand. Actually made money at the lemonade stand. Been in a school play. Been fired from a job. Taken a lie detector test. Swam with dolphins. Gone to Sea World. Attempted suicide. Voted for American/Australian Idol. Written poetry. Read more than 20 books a year. Gone to Europe. Loved someone you couldn’t have. Wondered about your sexuality. Used a coloring book over age 12. Had surgery. Had stitches. Taken a taxi. Seen the Washington Monument. Had more than 5 IM’s/online conversations going at once. Overdosed. Had a drug or alcohol problem. Been in a fist fight. Had a hamster. Petted a wild animal. Used a credit card. Gone surfing in California. Did “spirit day” at school. Dyed your hair. Got a tattoo. Had something pierced. Got straight A’s. Been on the Honor Roll. Your parents sent you to a shrink. Been handcuffed. Known someone with HIV or AIDS. Taken pictures with a webcam. Started a fire.

Interesting Webpage

2010-08-31T07:44:00.000-07:00

Hey, check this out and have some fun! Anybody can make music!
http://www.incredibox.fr/

Beth

Here's something to check out...

2010-08-25T23:51:00.001-07:00

I can't decide whether this vid is creepy or awesome or both! I think I love it, and wanna do it in a Broken Glass concert someday! :P

La'el

So In Love...

2010-08-24T20:03:00.000-07:00

Here's a song that I recently wrote...

V.1
I don't know if you understand
What you're doing to me
Just the simple touch of your hand
Distracts me so I cannot see
Anything that's around me
All I see is you

Ch.
I have looked all over the world and found
There is no-one like you
One look from you takes my breath away
I'm so in love with you

V.2
This sweet anguish of passion
Is cutting me straight to the heart
The look in your eyes is heaven
And I feel the love you impart
Every day you astound me
'Cause every day is new

Chorus

Bridge
We'll be together forever and no-one can sever
The love that we share
You show me that I can know that
Wherever I go you will always be there

Written by Beth Dyck on July 24th 2010

New Blog

2010-08-24T19:45:00.000-07:00

I don't know who reads this blog, but if anyone does, I've started a new(ish) blog about what I'd do with a million (or more) dollars. I'll still be posting on this blog as well though.

http://mymilliondollardreaming.blogspot.com

Beth

Let me hear your song!

2010-07-25T17:54:00.001-07:00

Let me hear your song!
Originally uploaded by f. prestes

Was just browsing on Flickr, and came across this gorgeous picture from f. prestes, and thought I'd share it.
Beth

desires

2010-07-07T22:10:00.001-07:00

There are a few things I really want to happen soon in my life. One would be a husband, and another would be to see God come in His glory. Sometimes it seems like neither of those things will ever happen...Beth

The Memory Of Trees

2010-02-28T22:43:00.000-08:00

So Enya has this album called "The Memory Of Trees", and I was listening to it and wondering what trees would remember if they could think and feel, see, smell, and hear. I imagined them waking up from an enchanted slumber, and stretching limb and leaf toward the sky. Feeling the sun, they'd think, "What is that warmth on my leaves? Oh, sun, I remember!" They'd wiggle their roots in the cool, hard dirt, deep below the grass. They'd say, "What's that I hear? Birds! Water! I remember.. I remember!" So, while I was listening to Enya, I decided to write a poem; a poem about 'The Memory of Trees...'

Sun and rain, wind and snow

In the memory of trees

Long green grass grows far below

Branches moved by breeze

Flood and drought, fire and storm

Did these old boughs mar

These trees with time and trials formed

Lithe and strong, yet scarred

Branches stretching to the sky

Reaching for the sun

While far below the soil lie

Roots entwined as one

Birds on limbs and branches nest

Bees in hives abide

Squirrels in nooks and crannies rest

Hiding nuts inside

Hunts and wars, and lovers' trysts

Encounters more than these

From lifetimes past, do still exist

In the memory of trees

Beth

Fade Away

2010-02-14T23:52:00.000-08:00

I close my eyes, and I see you standing before me.
I reach out my hand to touch you. Eyes and fingers trace every detail of your face, yet somehow, you remain a mystery.
We embrace; bodies together as one, cheek on cheek. My arms encircle your neck, and yours about my waist, yet I feel no warmth. I feel nothing but longing.
You smile tenderly on me. I wonder, who are you? You are an enigma. So close I can almost touch you, but too far away to know you.
My eyes open; you fade away like a memory.

La'el

Daydreaming... Again...

2010-02-08T22:03:00.000-08:00

Ah, if only I had the ability to make my daydreams come true...
So the other day I was putting on my makeup, and started thinking about what it would be like if I were going to the Grammys, or the Emmys, or the Golden Globes... If I were rich and famous... a celebrity... I'd set up something; maybe have someone I trust in a few cities I visit give me the name of a girl who is perhaps at a disadvantage somehow; poor, picked on, low self-esteem, terminal illness possibly... Someone who would really enjoy getting dressed up and treated like a princess for a day, but not ever getting the chance to. I'd take that girl, buy her a gown, get her hair and makeup professionally done, maybe a mani and pedi as well... And I'd take her down the red carpet with me. I figure once you've been to one or two of those things they'd get kinda boring, like they're all the same... maybe I'm wrong. But anyway, it would always be new this way, because this girl with me would be excited and seeing it through new eyes... And it would be a great time... And that's my daydream. And if anyone reads this and thinks I'm silly, please don't say so... Because I like to dream. And that's all this one will ever be... A dream; a nice thought.
La'el

All Of You

2009-12-26T23:11:00.000-08:00

So, for the longest time I wasn't sure if I wanted to post this song that I wrote, because I thought that some people may get offended, but then I remembered that pretty much nobody reads my blog anyway, so I decided to post it.
I was in bed one night thinking about how we as human beings, and even as Christians, hurt God, mostly without even knowing. We grieve his Spirit when we put other things ahead of Him in our lives, or have the wrong attitudes or motives, or just don't do things we know are right. And even though He forgives us readily, we still need to repent of the things we do regularly, if we ever plan on changing for the better. To repent simply means to change your mind about and turn away from something. I think so often, Christians stereotypically have this mindset that no matter what we do, its ok, because God forgives us. So therefore, its ok to do anything. And that's a wrong mindset according to the Bible. And we need to continually turn away from and change our mindset about things that aren't of God. And of course He's always there to help us, but its our choice. Its our decision. Christianity isn't about seeing how close we can get to that perverbial 'line' before we cross it, but seeing how close we can get to Jesus!
Anyway, I was lying in bed thinking about all this, and this song came to me...

Why do you run away from me, Though I love you so?
Why do you turn away from me, though I've done so much for you?
Yes, I've been so good to you.

Why do you grieve my Spirit so, with the things that you do
Why do you keep on doing the things that keep me away from you?
That keep me away from you

I want you to know me as I know you, completely and intimately
I want you to love me with a heart that's true
I don't want just a part, I want all of you

Why do you hide your face in shame, and try to disguise your sin?
Choose to repent and turn away. Don't you know what I've done for you?
Just accept what I've done for you.

I want you to know me as I know you, completely and intimately
I want you to love me with a heart that's true
I don't want just a part
I want you to want me in all you do, no matter how small things may seem
I want you to feel me always with you
I don't want just a part, I want all of you

Beth

The Minstrel

2009-12-05T23:58:00.000-08:00

This was a 30-minute challenge given to me by a wonderful lady and amazing songwriter named Jane Eamon at a songwriting workshop I recently attended. The goal was to write a story song about a fairytale, using just verses in the same meter. I made up my own fairytale based on another person attending the workshop. This was the result after 30 minutes. Dedicated to Bob. :)

"The Minstrel"
Once upon a time not long ago, in a land not far away
Was a minstrel who would never write a song that was cliche.
He'd sit and ponder till he could find exactly the right words
So that he could write amazing songs like no-one's ever heard.

One fine day he organized a songwriting workshop
And people came from miles around to hear this lady talk.
When they found she was a fairy song-mother, they all cried out with glee
And all at once they asked, 'do you have some advice for me?'

She turned, and to the minstrel said, 'sir, I would like you
To write a song full of cliches, with a twang of country too.'
At this, he cringed, and then he frowned, and finally he sighed.
He shook his head to clear his mind, and said 'for you, I'll try.'

So he took his pen and paper and jotted down some notes
And this country song full of cliches was the best he ever wrote!
Now he sings his songs to many fans all across the land
And he travels not all alone, but with his country band.

The Day We Meet

2009-12-05T23:46:00.000-08:00

I wrote this song about the day I meet my future husband...
November 15th, 2009

If I could see your face right now,
I wonder what I'd say
Would I confess undying love,
Or would I run away?
I'm waiting for the day we meet
I'm hoping that I'll know
That the two of us were meant to be
I'll feel it in my soul.

I will wait patiently
For you to come and be with me
But I long for the day we meet

If I could hear your voice right now
I wonder what I'd hear
Would you say you don't want to live your life
Without me near?
Maybe I already know you
Only as a friend
One day we might just wake up
And see love around the bend.

So I will wait patiently
For you to come and be with me
But I long for the day we meet.

Happy For You

2009-08-18T23:36:00.001-07:00

So, I just finished writing another song...
The inspiration came from a friend.
Disclaimer: The emotions and thoughts portrayed in this song are not necessarily those of the artist. =:^)
Enjoy!

Happy For You
Beth Dyck
August 13th 2009

Verse 1
Well I heard just the other day that you got yourself a girl
That little bit of info put my heart into a whirl
You see that really wasn’t what I wanted to hear
I used to have some hopes and dreams of a future with you near
But from me all you’re gonna hear is

Chorus
I’m happy for you. Don’t worry ‘bout me
You’re the only one who matters, don’t fear for my sanity
You’re not gonna see me cry, and you won’t hear me complain
Even if I have to lie, I will look at you and say
I’m happy for you

Verse 2
You used to be a real good friend, before you went away
Didn’t know how much you meant to me until it was too late
Now I’m left here wishing I could say that I wanna make you mine
But you’re with someone else, so I’ve gotta leave those words behind
And now I guess all I can say is

Chorus

Bridge
I’ll never know how great we could’ve been; together, you and me
But I’ll get over it eventually, wait and see

Verse 3
Well I heard just the other day that you got yourself a girl
So I’ll just wish the two of you all of the love in the world
Cause…

Chorus

NEW SONG!! YAY!

2009-07-31T23:19:00.000-07:00

I *finally* wrote a new song... ok, so its a silly song about sudoku, but hey, I'll take what I can get right now; its my first song in almost a year!

V.1
Sudoku, how I love your numbers
Sudoku, and your boxes too
Arranging numbers 1 to 9
Oh, you're so fine!

V.2
Sudoku, you are such a challenge
Sudoku, you are so much fun
Oh, North, South, East and West
Yeah, you're the best!

Chorus
When I win a game I get this feeling deep inside
It brings a smile to my face, and its a smile I just can't hide

V.3
Sudoku, you can be easy or hard
Sudoku, you are the life of the party
If I play you before bed
You start to mess with my head

Chorus

*Enjoy!*
Beth

"The new and improved umbrella song"

2009-07-31T22:59:00.000-07:00

Well, a couple of days ago as an exercise, I rewrote the words to Rihanna's "Umbrella". Here's the 'New & Improved Umbrella Song'!

He knows your heart
Even though you are worlds apart
And He has washed you clean
Given you a brand new start
Baby, and in the dark
He'll be your Shining Star
'Cause that's when you'll need Him there
For you He'll always care
Because...

When the Son comes He'll reign forever
Then you'll always be together
He will always be your friend
Took up the cross and He carried it to the end
Though its raining more than ever
Know that you still have each other
You can stand under His umbrella
You can stand under His umbrella
ella ella ay ay ay, under His umbrella ella ella ay ay ay

Now sin and things
That you allow to come in between
Don't have to be your king
Ask Him to make you clean
When things in life get hard
When the devil tears you apart
Just ask Jesus to start
And He will heal your heart
Because...

When the Son comes He'll reign forever
Then you'll always be together
He will always be your friend
Took up the cross and He carried it to the end
Though its raining more than ever
Know that you still have each other
You can stand under His umbrella
You can stand under His umbrella
ella ella ay ay ay, under His umbrella ella ella ay ay ay

You can run into His arms
Its okay don't be alarmed
Draw near to Him
You're so very dear to Jesus' heart
So go on let the rain fall
He'll be all you need and more
Because...

Beth

Stuck

2009-07-27T20:22:00.000-07:00

I sit here, staring at a blank page.

Ok, so its not blank anymore...
Its been blasted hot out lately, with quite a few storms that include thunder, lightning, uber-strong winds, torrential rains, and/or walnut-sized hail. (Very unusual for the Okanagan; they haven't seen stuff like this in like twenty years!) I've been getting up at 6 to go to work so I can quit earlier because of the heat. After work, I either do a lot, or I don't do much, but no matter what I do or don't do, I don't do anything creative. Nothing artistic. I haven't written a song in almost a year. I can't draw. I don't know how to paint. Playing music feels boring right now. Its hot, I feel creatively constipated, and I think I may just go crazy. And I'm thinking this in an eerily monotone voice. In my head. As I write. Good grief I'm bored! Even when I'm so stinkin' busy that I don't have time to be bored I'm bored. Dunno how that's possible, but it must be somehow. I thought that after all the lessons and recitals and things had ended at the beginning of summer, that I would have time, energy and motivation to be creative; artistic. I don't. Heck, I dunno if I even remember how to be creative. I don't want to pick up my guitar. I don't want to try and write a song or poem. I don't want to go plunk away on the piano. I don't want to try to draw or paint, because I know it won't look good. But something deep down inside me is dying to imagine, to concoct; to dream up and fashion... something... anything! But what? How? I think I'm stuck.

Mrs. Darcy

2009-07-19T23:41:00.000-07:00

Just watched Pride and Prejudice again, for like at least the 5th or 6th time... Don't think I'll ever get tired of watching that movie; I never catch all of what they're saying anyway, so each time I watch it I understand more of the dialogue. They talk so fast in that accent, sometimes it sounds like a different language! Watching Pride and Prejudice always makes me wistful. It makes me wish I was a "Mrs. Darcy" and that I had a "Mr. Darcy" of my own. Not a Mr. Collins, or even a Mr. Bingley, but a Mr. Darcy. The drama; the wit; the biting sarcasm and clever put-downs... The contempt-turned-to-love... The happily-ever-after...
Sometimes I find it hard to enjoy being single, even after over three years of practice. Maybe its because I wasn't for so long... Who knows. All I know is that I'm looking forward to meeting my 'Mr. Darcy' and having moments with him where we're both "completely and perfectly and incandescently happy."

'The Thief'

2009-07-01T20:24:00.000-07:00

I've been playing a lot of Brooke Fraser these last few days; specifically one song called 'The Thief'. Its a really pretty song, and I've been learning to play it on guitar, but I also really love the words. Listening to that song makes me wonder when my 'thief' is gonna come and steal the key to my heart...

The Thief

Your eyes are full
Full of the future of us
The air changes as you look across
At me in that wondering way

It is as if
I knew you before we spoke
Do our hearts know something we don't?
Conspiring, converging without giving us any say

[CHORUS]
You, sing me to sleep
Talk down my walls
Look through my windows as I wait
You could be the thief
I give the key to

You're ruining me
With secrets and gestures and looks
With sonnets from second-hand books
Playing the chords in me nobody knew how to play

[CHORUS]

[Bridge]
It fits in your hand like water in rain
It unlocks our two different selves
And shows we are the same
Rather than wait `til I put me out for the taking
You're breaking
You're breaking
You're breaking into my heart
And I'm letting you

Happy Canada Day btw!

The Writing Desk...

2009-06-25T23:45:00.000-07:00

Its funny how people think that if they just buy this one more thing, it'll somehow change their lives... Take myself for instance; in May, I got this beautiful writing desk that I absolutely love! Now, I've wanted a desk like this for years; an actual writing desk (not an ugly computer desk). I guess I had this grand idea that if I got a writing desk, I'd suddenly become so inspired and spend hours upon hours sitting at that desk letting words spill onto paper in the form of graceful songs and eloquent poems. But that hasn't happened yet. My life is super busy, I'm hardly ever at home, I'm uninspired, and my gorgeous desk sits here in my room, alone and unused. That's just sad.
In other news, the fam and I are going camping and to a gospel fest this weekend... should be fun!
Beth

The Dawning

2009-06-14T00:20:00.000-07:00

Here's a poem I stumbled on by George Herbert.....

THE DAWNING

WAKE, sad heart, whom sorrow ever drowns ;
Take up thine eyes, which feed on earth ;
Unfold thy forehead, gathered into frowns ;
Thy Saviour comes, and with Him mirth :
Awake, awake,
And with a thankful heart His comforts take.
But thou dost still lament, and pine, and cry,
And feel His death, but not His victory.

Arise, sad heart ; if thou dost not withstand,
Christ's resurrection thine may be ;
Do not by hanging down break from the hand
Which, as it riseth, raiseth thee :
Arise, Arise;
And with His burial linen drie thine eyes.
Christ left His grave-clothes, that we might, when grief
Draws tears or blood, not want a handkerchief.

(written in 1886)

"Breathe In Me"

2009-06-08T23:19:00.000-07:00

So, for the last few years, I've been feeling spiritually dry and kinda deadish inside, and its been really frustrating, especially since I've been leading worship at my church, because people say that worship was great and that the Holy Spirit was there, but I don't know except through what they say. There's a song by Michael W. Smith called "Breathe In Me" that sounds like how I feel, so I've kind of made it my theme song and my prayer of late...

You breathe in me and I'm alive
With the power of your holiness
You breathe in me and you revive
Feelings in my soul that I have laid to rest

So breathe in me, I need you now
I've never felt so dead within
So breathe in me; Maybe somehow
You can breathe new life in me again

I used to be so sensitive
To the light that leads to where you are
Now I've acquired these callouses
With the darkness of a cold and jaded heart

So breathe in me, I need you now
I've never felt so dead within
So breathe in me; Maybe somehow
You can breathe new life in me again

While I was at work today, I was praying, and one of the things I was praying about was this desert-like ice age I've been in this last while. And while I was praying, this Bible verse came to me:
"See! The winter is past;
the rains are over and gone.

Flowers appear on the earth;
the season of singing has come,
the cooing of doves
is heard in our land.

The fig tree forms its early fruit;
the blossoming vines spread their fragrance.
Arise, come, my darling;
my beautiful one, come with me."

Song Of Solomon 2:11-13

So, that was quite encouraging. I quite enjoy those verses!

Bethie

Daydreaming...

2009-06-06T00:15:00.000-07:00

So, while I was at work yesterday, I was daydreaming. About Josh Groban. He's one of my favourite singers, and I (and probably every other girl who knows about him) like to imagine that he's singing his songs to me... Anyway, a friend and I are talking about road trip to LA this fall, and I was imagining that we got down there, and were exploring the city, when we met Josh walking down the sidewalk. Now, of course this would NEVER happen, but... He stops us and introduces himself (of course though we know who he is, but don't make a big deal about the fact that he's in the middle of the sidewalk talking to us... you know, the publicity thing...). So, anywho, he stops us and tells us that there's an award show that night and he and a friend were thinking they'd do something different for their dates and pick a couple of random girls in the city, and we looked like nice girls. So he asks us if we wanted to be his and his friend's dates for the evening. Of course we say 'yes', but we didn't have anything to wear. SO, Josh takes us shopping for a couple of evening gowns... Then we get our hair and makeup done professionally, and meet up with Josh's friend, and away the four of us go. Yup, I have a good imagination. Meh, it helped pass the time at work. Sometimes though, I wish just once in a while things could happen like they do in daydreams and movies... I guess I'm a big fan of fairytales. And daydreams. And I know God has something and someone way better for me than I could think or imagine or daydream, but it is still nice to dream. =:^)

More Random Blogthings...

2009-05-26T23:02:00.000-07:00

You Are a Cappuccino

You're fun, outgoing, and you love to try anything new.

However, you tend to have strong opinions on what you like.

You are a total girly girly at heart - and prefer your coffee with good conversation.

You're the type that seems complex to outsiders, but in reality, you are easy to please

What Kind of Coffee Girl Are You?

You Are a Mermaid

You are a total daydreamer, and people tend to think you're flakier than you actually are.

While your head is often in the clouds, you'll always come back to earth to help someone in need.

Beyond being a caring person, you are also very intelligent and rational.

You understand the connections of the universe better than almost anyone else.

What Mythological Creature Are You?

Random Blogthing...

2009-05-26T22:47:00.000-07:00

Your Career Type: Artistic

You are expressive, original, and independent.

Your talents lie in your artistic abilities: creative writing, drama, crafts, music, or art.

You would make an excellent:

Actor - Art Teacher - Book Editor

Clothes Designer - Comedian - Composer

Dancer - DJ - Graphic Designer

Illustrator - Musician - Sculptor

The worst career options for your are conventional careers, like bank teller or secretary.

What's Your Ideal Career?

Fetishes...

2009-05-21T23:24:00.000-07:00

Some people have a shoe fetish. Or a purse fetish. Maybe even a hat fetish. While I do quite enjoy the searching for, purchasing, and wearing of all these items, I'd have to say I have instead a journal fetish. That's right, I LOVE journals! I tend to use different journals for different things, and have at least two or three going at any one time. I'll think of any excuse to buy a cute journal that catches my eye, and have quite a few that I haven't started to write in yet.
There's so much potential in an empty journal; blank pages waiting to be filled with hopes and dreams, heartbreaks, secrets, lists and general ramblings. I always have expectations when I start a new journal to create these eloquent works of art in my writing, but I usually end up with splotched pages, doodles, and even half-written entries. While this disappoints me slightly, it will never stop me from writing in and loving my journals. =:^)

Bethie

Daydream believer?

2009-05-14T19:48:00.000-07:00

I've been having this recurring daydream; I'm taking a walk down in the woods by the creek, when this guy comes up and asks if he can walk with me. He's cute, so of course I say 'sure'. We start chatting, and, long story short, we start hanging out, fall in love, and get married... down by the creek. Fat chance of that happening. But anyway, its a nice daydream; so much nicer in my head than in print.
It's absolutely gorgeous down by the creek right now; all the snow's melting/ed up in the mountains and the creek is rushing and roaring through the normally quiet wood. The atmosphere down there is enchanting; cool and damp on a hot day, and the wet cedar smell is one of my favourite fragrances! If only bottled cedar fragrance smelled a little more like that and a little less like chemicals... Anyway, can't wait to go for another walk down there!

Voices

2009-05-12T22:00:00.000-07:00

Voices; from the left and the right, pushing their way through my thoughts.
A plethora of tones, styles, and words; the resonance an incessant drone, rising and falling in volume and intensity, punctuated by a laugh or exclamation.
Voices, male and female, blend together in harmony and dissonance. Voices happy and sad, loud and soft. No words to make out; just people talking, and talking endlessly.
A symphony performed by oblivious musicians. People unmindful of all but those with whom their voices connect.
I stand, bid farewell to the cafe, and leave the voices behind.

'Mi Morena'

2009-05-10T19:39:00.000-07:00

I saw this picture on Doorways Around the World and really loved it because it totally made me think of the Josh Groban song 'Mi Morena'. Whenever I hear that song, I imagine a girl dancing in an Italian or Sicilian cobblestone courtyard, clothed in a beautiful white dress. She has long, flowing, dark hair, and a wreath of flowers on her head. She's dark-skinned, beautiful, barefoot, and is wearing bracelets and anklets. There's the faint sound of someone playing Spanish guitar coming from some open window, and she's dancing in the rain. Of course she thinks she's alone, but unbeknownst to her, the man who loves her is silently watching from his balcony, just drinking in the sight of her; the rain making her dress and hair cling to her body as she twirls with arms outstretched.

(Photographer: Melinda Brovelli of Melinda Trips 2007. This doorway is in Sciacca, Sicily.)

Song by Eden

2009-05-07T11:37:00.001-07:00

I went on down to the bridges of life and met my Grandma there
She sprayed on too much perfume, and turned blue, and didn't know what to do
And her hair all fell out.

Eden Dyck, 4 years old

Focus

2009-04-10T00:32:00.000-07:00

It isn't long ago that I would write and the words would flow so effortlessly. I have wondered why that recently, I can hardly write at all. I feel the need, the urgency to let words flow onto paper, to mingle elegant words together to create beautiful verse and rhyme. But my imagination has gone and left me. I yearn to write; to put pen to paper and let the words stream out of my mind into plain view, but often nothing comes. It is frustrating, confusing, and depressing.
I think I have figured out why I find it so hard to write of late: My focus has changed. I have gone from thinking and writing about God, His creation, and His people, to writing about me, my feelings, and my desires. And now my well has gone dry. Tisn't a bad thing to write about self, though one can only write so much about onesself before they run out of things to write. Therefore, I believe that a shift in focus is essential for my writing, and, with God's help, I hope to accomplish this.

Release

2009-04-10T00:08:00.000-07:00

Inside of me is a poem, a masterpiece just waiting to be released. I close my eyes and open my mouth, but my tongue stays silent. I reach for paper to write it down, but my hand goes still. My heart cries to be released in this creative venture, yet my mind does not receive the promptings and cues from my soul. What can be done to set free the creativity locked inside? I must find release for these thoughts and emotions. I must set loose these visions in my heart. I must be free!

Quote: What Is Joy?

2009-04-09T23:53:00.000-07:00

"Joy is when your heart and spirit soar and fly!"

~ My 4-year old sister, Eden

Quote

2009-04-05T23:33:00.000-07:00

"When the night is bad and my nerves are shattered and the waves break over the sides, Infinity speaks. God Almighty shares through His Son the depth of His feelings for me, His love flashes into my soul, and I am overtaken by mystery."

~Brennan Manning in The Furious Longing Of God

Contrast

2009-03-29T22:39:00.000-07:00

Outside, the air gets warmer; the sun shines again.
Inside feels as cold and dark as a stormy winter's night.
Outside, trees are budding, flowers are blooming, birds are singing; there is life all around.
Inside feels dead, dreary, desolate; but wait... Movement!
Turmoil. Confusion. Creativity colliding with concrete walls in heart and mind.
Must beak free; express tangibly.
Frustration builds as passions tarry behind steel doors.
Outside, spring is in the air, and creatures awake from slumber.
Inside, a bound heart cries out, "God save me!"

Polyvore

2009-03-28T23:49:00.000-07:00

I've been feeling a bit blah and uninspired lately, and I came across this website Polyvore stumbling blogs, so I thought I'd try it out and here's what I came up with...

B&W - by hellwreckin.gurl on Polyvore.com

Cossroads

2009-03-14T00:07:00.000-07:00

"What's life about anyway", is the question in my mind. Is it about giving all you can to make the word a better place to live? Is it about self-satisfaction and self-gratification; doing what I want and trying to make myself happy? I just don't know.
I look ahead on the road of life and see so many paths I could take; too many choices! Some are broad and straight, while others are narrow and winding. Some go uphill, some go down, and others are hidden by trees and brush. Some look easy to follow with no great destination, while others have ends so inviting, but paths filled with rocks and thornbushes.
I wonder then, is the end really worth the pain and struggle? Seemingly all these roads have tollbooths at their starts and some farther on as well. Many accept a toll greater than I can afford. This does nothing to help my decision, but may even hinder it. Mayhap I have a destiny down one of those roads...
What is my purpose on this earth? Where does my passion lie? Which path do I traverse?

March 12th 2009

Christmas Poem

2009-03-12T23:20:00.000-07:00

Angels bent low one cold dark night to worship the One whom they adored;
A babe, just born in a stable stall, He was Christ, the Lord.
They braved the cold and endured the smell to hear the lusty cries
Of the Child who brought tears of joy to His mother's eyes.

The angels flew to hills nearby to spread the news of joy.
Shepherds were among the first to hear of the baby boy.
The angels watched as some wise men traveled from afar.
On camels' backs they made their way by following a star.

"Surely," All the angels said, "We won't forget the sight
Of the Son of God coming to earth on this cold, dark night."

December 2008

Life Soundtrack

2009-03-12T22:21:00.001-07:00

So, here's how it works:

1. Open your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question, type the song that's playing
5. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. Don't lie and try to pretend you're cool...just type it in man!

Opening Credits:
Loving Me Anyway - Jaylene Johnson

Waking Up:
So She Dances - Josh Groban

First Day At School:
Is This Love - Bob Marley

Falling In Love:
I Do - Paul Brandt

Fight Song:
Stuck In The Middle With You - BTO

Breaking Up:
All Over Me - Paul Brandt

Prom:
Once In A Lifetime - Keith Urban

Life:
If I Had A Million Dollars - Barenaked Ladies

Mental Breakdown:
How Do You Know - Third Day

Driving:
How Long - Andy Shauf

Flashback:
Wonder - Jaylene Johnson

Getting Back Together:
Communion - Third Day

Wedding:
Only Have My Love - Jaylene Johnson

Birth of Child:
Glory - Casting Crowns

Final Battle:
I Can Feel It - Third Day

Death Scene:
Weeping Time - Jon Buller

Funeral Song:
Gone Is The Light - Steve Bell

End Credits:
Let Me Fall - Josh Groban

More Randomosities

2009-02-24T20:47:00.001-08:00

Because I have SO much time on my hands and NOTHING else to do... (not)

You Are A Thoughtful Idealist

You are a bit tentative when it comes to new experiences. You have to push yourself to try new things, but once you do, you love the adventure.

You like to think that people are impressed by you. You know that you have a lot to offer.

You are a very romantic person. You can't help but see the world as it should be.

Right now, you feel like the whole world is open to you. You see lots of possibilities.

Overall, your life is dramatic and unpredictable. You life in interesting times.

You feel like the fate of the future partially rests in your hands. You believe you need to help make the world a better place.

The Castle Personality Test

You Are a Hazelnut Latte

You often having the craving for something exotic. You get bored easily.

You are a true adventurer. Nothing makes you happier than traveling.

You're a very cosmopolitan and worldly person. You have sophisticated tastes.

You have a keen attention to detail. Little things matter to you - you are a bit of a perfectionist.

What Flavor Latte Are You?

You Are 84% Interesting

Believe it or not, you are a very fascinating person.

You're probably too busy being interesting to realize exactly how interesting you are.

You have a rich, full life. You are curious about the world, and you are very open to new experiences.

You have a lot to talk about, and people find you to be an amazing conversationalist.

And most importantly, you are truly interested in other people. How could anyone find that boring?

You truly listen and learn from others. You're not self absorbed or shallow.

Are You Boring or Interesting?

You Are the Sense of Sound

You love to talk, but you also love to listen.

You are simply a natural conversationalist.

You can have a deep conversation that lasts for hours and come out of it feeling energized.

You have a good ear for foreign languages and accents of all sorts.

You can imitate people quite well.

You also are a huge lover of music. You probably love music more than most people you know.

Which of the Five Senses Are You?

Your Fitness Type: Expressive

You find most exercise to be repetitive and dull.

But if you're able to express yourself, you hardly feel like you're exercising.

Try taking a dance class. Any kind that interests you, from ballet to hip hop.

You may also find that skiing, skateboarding, and roller skating are expressive sports in their own right!

How Should You Get Fit?

Randomosities...

2009-02-24T20:18:00.000-08:00

Your Birthday Predicts You're Independent

Ever since you were born, you've loved doing your own thing.

You enjoy puzzles and games. Anything that stretches your mind interests you.

You are a quiet person - often lost in your own thoughts. Others find you completely mysterious.

You have so much fun thinking, dreaming, and planing. You hardly have time for friends.

What Does Your Birthday Predict About You?

You Crave an Important Life

Your dream is to life a live a life that leaves a mark.

You'd like to have a mission or journey to complete, even if it takes years.

You want your life to be meaningful, and having a final goal brings you meaning.

You'd like to accomplish something big, if only to inspire others to believe it can be done.

The Sunset Test

Your Friendship Style is Empathetic

You deeply care about each person you're friends with. For you, friendship is all about the personal connection.

You tend to know everything about your friends' lives... and they know everything about yours. Your friends are your confidants.

You are always there for your friends. You celebrate their successes and support them in their times of need.

You are as loyal as they come. And you expect the same loyalty and understanding from your friends in return.

You and another Empathetic Friend: Have a amazing friendship, when it works. You care for each other deeply, but you often end up with hurt feelings and drama.

You and a Gregarious Friend: May have a bit of a one sided friendship. You adore your Social Friend, but you sometimes feel a bit neglected.

You and an Independent Friend: Struggle a bit. You are very interested in your Independent Friend's life, but your friend often needs more space.

You and a Philosophical Friend: Respect one another. You love to learn about your Philosophical Friend's brilliant ideas.

What's Your Friendship Style?

You Are a Mac

You are creative, stylish, and super trendy.

You are a bit obsessed with gadgets, and you like owning the newest devices.

You aren't the type of person who separates work from pleasure.

In your opinion, all work should be fun. You love creating.

Aesthetics are very important to you. You like to be surrounded by beautiful, sleek things.

You demand the best - even if it costs an arm and a leg.

Are You a Mac or a PC?

Your Travel Personality Is: The Adventurer

For you, travel is how you learn about the world. And you like to learn the stuff that's not in guidebooks.

You truly have wanderlust. When you're not traveling, you're dreaming about where you'll go next.

And your travels are truly legendary - they leave you with stories you'll be telling for the rest of your life!

What's Your Travel Personality?

Writers Block

2009-02-17T01:04:00.000-08:00

Within me are the makings of a perfect storm; tumultuous thoughts twist and tangle together with long-lost figments and fancies, kicking up dust and stirring leaves long settled in my mind. If I could but unleash the force of these imaginings and develop them into something tangible, there may just happen to be a mind-storm of epic proportions.
Alas, as I place pen upon paper, all becomes calm. My hand stays still as a statue. Not one thought flutters. Not one picture glimmers in the light of an idea. Not one ink stroke does my pen produce. Nothing at all. The leaves settle once again.

2008-10-29T23:50:00.000-07:00

I'm so tired, yet so very restless. There must be more! The things which appear before my eyes just cannot be all there is. Is this really what life is about? Surround yourself with pretty things; pretty rooms, pretty clothes... There MUST be more! Day after day its the same. We may be dying inside, but we must look good on the outside. We pretend so well, that we don't even feel the death taking hold of our spirits! What we hide from others becomes hidden even from us. We deceive ourselves! We think we are so well and whole, when in reality we are diseased and crippled. We think we are so rich and wise and spiritual. We're not. We're poor, and foolish, and limping or even crawling spiritually because You are not our Center. We call ourselves 'Christ Followers', yet we are too busy with our meaningless little lives to even make it to church on time. We don't follow You too well when there are so many other things to do.
We have clothed our desperation in fine looking garments of pride and self-sufficiency, but they hold no warmth. The garment You offer is 100 times more fine than ours, and it is warm and comfortable! Why do we reject it in favour of our ratty costumes?
Your presence left us long ago, but we hardly even noticed, being so busy with jobs, activities, and making sure our lives look good to others.
Bah! So tired! Everything is meaningless! Everything but You, and my desperation for you. Fill me once more with Your presence! I repent of my wickedness; my attraction to what is carnal! Please, don't hide Your presence from me any longer, or I will die! I need You! I unclothe my desperation and lay it bare at Your feet! Take it and replace it with the fullness of Your everlasting Spirit!
There IS more; I know it! Lord, I need more! More of You!

What Happened

2008-10-28T22:59:00.000-07:00

What happened to the way things used to be, when You and I were so close?
What happened to the times we spent together in the morning glow?
I once could feel You near me; now you seem so far away.
It takes all the strength I have to get through each day.
I used to know Your presence with me everywhere I'd go.
Now I struggle just to tell myself that even still I know
That You really haven't left me, You are with me still.
But there's a hole within me that only You can fill.
So let me feel Your presence, Lord. Let me know Your touch.
Lay your hand upon me, for I need you oh so much!
Breathe Your life into me for I need to be renewed.
Pull me back together before I come unglued.
I need to know You're here; to feel You by my side.
I know my need for You is one that will not be denied.

Oct. 14th, 08

Untitled

2008-10-28T22:51:00.000-07:00

O, the sight! Bloodshed all around. To think the blind are blessed to not see this carnage. To consider that the deaf have been favoured among men because they hear not the anguished wail & lament of those that lost whom they loved. Ah, the dead may be glad they lived not to know the suffering; the torment that we, the alive must bear.
What misery! Such wretchedness my heart cannot comprehend! We were made for other than this bitter existence. Ah remorse, I feel you keenly within my chest. See, the sun rises red, revealing the field of bodies before me; unveiling the consummation of a hopeless battle.
O, life's grievous end.

Oct. 28th, 08

Untitled

2008-10-14T23:13:00.000-07:00

My beloved, how I long to hold you close in My arms and whisper sweet words of love in your ear.
How My heart aches when you encounter difficulties in life, and even more so when you don't come to me for help and comfort.
Oh, how I yearn to converse with you and divulge to you secrets only heaven knows, but you aren't listening.
How I desire intimacy with you; to be involved in every aspect of your life, no matter how great or small.
You hear My voice calling to you; wooing and drawing you, but you make no reply.
Oh my precious one, I've so much more for you than the life you're living!
How long will you break my heart and walk away from Me?
How long, beloved?

Oct. 14th, 2008

My Beloved

2008-10-14T22:55:00.000-07:00

Have you ever doubted My heart for you? Is that why you find it so hard to ask for My help when you are in such great need? Have faith in your heavenly Father. Know that My promises to you are true.

If you ask of Me, you will receive. Not on your terms, but on Mine. If you seek Me you will find Me; I will come to you. If you knock, I will open the door for you. I have spoken; I have promised; I have invited you to come to me. Now I am awaiting your response.

I long to spend time alone with you, My beloved. Sometimes it is hard for you to be transparent with Me when there are others around. So get away somewhere private, in your room or in a quiet garden. And when you come to Me in secret, I will demonstrate My goodness to you before many. They will know of My love for you.

If you wonder whether I desire to bless you, think about this: Even evil people know how to give good gifts to their children. So just imagine how much more I not only want to, but also can do for you, if you will just ask Me. For I am your heavenly Father, the Lord who delights in those who put their hope in My unfailing love.

Anonymous

Come

2008-10-06T22:54:00.000-07:00

Come, let me embrace you. Let your heart rest on mine as they beat in sync.
Come, let me hold you. Feel my arms of comfort; a stronghold around you, keeping you safe.
Come, let me gaze into your eyes. Look into mine and see the endless depth of my love for you.
Come, let me whisper into your heart the wonderful and amazing things I have planned for you.
Come, let me breathe my life into your soul so you may truly live.
Come, let me be everything you need. Let me be your all.

October 7th, 2008

Out Of The Storm (song)

2008-08-12T21:01:00.000-07:00

She stands all alone on the corner
Shivering in the cold, dark rain
It mingles with tears running down her cheeks
She wishes it could wash her clean

She doesn't know who she can turn to
She doesn't know where she should go
She cowers alone in the shadows
One look at her and you'd know

She needs comfort, she needs a friend
Someone who loves her with a love that won't end
She needs a shelter; a place safe and warm
Someone to bring her in, out of the storm

A little boys stands in a graveyard
Angrily wiping his tears
'Cause they just buried his Mama
And he just can't leave her here

He doesn't know what's gonna happen
Now that she's gone away
He cannot fathom the reason
Why she couldn't have stayed

He needs comfort, he needs a friend
Someone who loves him with a love that won't end
He needs a shelter; a place safe and warm
Someone to bring him in, out of the storm

Jesus looks down from His throne up above
His eyes are upon us, and they're full of love

He is our comfort, He is our friend
He really loves us, and His love never ends
He is our Shelter, our place safe and warm
He'll bring us in, out of the storm

(August 11th 2008)

Speak To Me...

2008-08-01T00:47:00.000-07:00

Oh, let me tell the tales of heaven! Show me the beauty that lies beyond those golden gates; beyond my reach. Speak to me, that I may scribe Your words for others to read. Let me hear the melodies rolling from the tongues of angels so I may repeat them here on earth. Guide my hand, that it might capture the glory and splendour of Your creation for all to see! Let my voice mix with Yours to make a sound not yet heard on this earth. Put Your words in my mind so I may write with eloquence.
Without You, I am naught. Without You, I do not exist. Nothing exists.

July 16th, 2008

"Strong Enough" (song)

2008-08-01T00:43:00.000-07:00

The tears are rolling down my face
I hear those words my mind can't erase
And my soul is aching

Oh when will all this misery end?
I feel like I just lost my best friend
And my heart is breaking

Oh where did we go wrong? I thought our love was strong.
Guess it wasn't strong enough. No it wasn't strong enough.

You said you'd always be there for me
That you'd love me for all eternity
I guess you were lying

You left me standing here all alone
You said you know that I'm not "The One"
Now my soul is dying

Oh where did we go wrong? I thought our love was strong.
Guess it wasn't strong enough. No it wasn't strong enough.

I know you're not coming back; I never thought you would
But I would never take you back, even if I could!

There's a smile upon my face
I've run into my Saviour's embrace
And my soul is mending

I never want this moment to end
Just spending time with my Best Friend
It's a happy ending

He gave my heart a song, and I'm right where I belong
'Cause His love is strong enough. Yes His love is strong enough.

July 31st 2008

Nightsong

2008-05-21T17:12:00.001-07:00

The Nightsong is being sung. Can you hear it?
Attentive ears heed the splendid singing of the stream skimming over smoothened stones and sand, winding its way through a wood enchanted by the Nightsong.
Roving eyes rest on the tall, stately trees, cloaked in magnificent mossy majesty. Their leaves tinkle in melodious harmony to the soothing sound of the brook singing the Nightsong.
Skin tingles as a warm night wind weaves her way through the regal trees, and whispers to fallen leaves, enticing them to waltz with her to the Nightsong.
Vision is enhanced as mellow beams of moonlight drift downward to land on the forest floor and ride on ripples of flowing water.
Exquisite fragrances are freed from the flowers on the forest floor, passionately responding to the Nightsong.
All around, the Nightsong is being sung. Just listen.

Just Me

2008-05-03T19:32:00.000-07:00

My hands crave the tender touch of another, bigger, stronger, holding them tenderly.
My ears desire to feel the warm breath as my love whispers softly, words of undying love and affection.
My eyes long to sweep over his face and memorize every defining feature.
My heart hungers for the passion felt when he kisses my mouth and my fingers find their way through his hair.
But there is no passion to feel, no face to peruse and memorize, no whispered pledge of devotion, no strong arms to hold me.

Nothing.

Just me.

Hide & Seek

2008-04-23T13:41:00.000-07:00

Ready or not, here I come!
I'm gonna find you wherever you run.
Go on and hide; we'll have some fun!
Ready or not, here I come!

Your turn to hide; my turn to seek.
I promise You now that I won't peek.
I'll sneak up behind you; you'll let out a shriek...
Its your turn to hide and my turn to seek.

I'm searching all over; can't find you.
Where in the world did you get to?
Spinning in circles; don't know what to do!
I'm searching all over, but I can't find you!

Wait, what's over behind that tree?
Could it really be you that I see?
It is! I found you! I found you!
Bet ya can't catch me!

April 22nd 2008

You...

2008-04-15T16:37:00.000-07:00

The sun in all its glorious splendour pales in comparison to You!

The mountains, majestic and mighty, fall prostrate at Your feet!

The imperial, stately trees of the forest humbly
bend their knees before You!

Even the rocks and stones cry out Your name and sing Your praises!

How much more should we, who were made by You in Your image, who were purchased by Your Son, love and worship you! How much more should we desire to exalt and honour You, bowing low in reverence before Your throne!!

April 15th 2008

How Beautiful!

2008-04-15T15:53:00.000-07:00

Walking down a wooded path, I see life all around In the trees slowly awakening, the little yellow flowers blooming like drops of sunshine on the hillside.
Oh, how beautiful You must be!

My eyes are drawn by the plethora of blues, browns, and greens! Oh the colour! Oh the shades! My mind cannot take in all the wonder of your world!
How beautiful You must be!

My ears are tuned to the silver stream singing its praises to You. A robin trills with exuberant pleasure, while a dove coos mournfully.
Oh, how beautiful You must be!

The cool, refreshing rain on my skin, the warm, consoling sun on my face, and the agile breeze dancing through the stately trees are signs of life; of spring; the glorious awakening of majesty!
God, how beautiful You must be!

The fragrance of dewy leaves and moistened earth mingles with the pungent pines, spruce and cedar and tantalizes my senses.
Lord, how beautiful You must be!

I am enraptured by the resplendent, dazzling creation that tumbled out of Your heart and spilled from Your mouth! That you just uttered a word and from it flowed life is unfathomable to me!
Oh, how much more beautiful than this You must be!!

April 15th 2008

Call on His Name (song)

2008-04-15T15:43:00.001-07:00

You feel lost, you don't know where you're going
You have it all, but it doesn't satisfy.
You have a hole, way deep down in your heart
And you can't fill it, no matter what you try.

Well, lift your head, it won't be much longer
Till you see what's right before your eyes

When you can't find your way, just call on His Name
He'll be right there beside you.
When you don't know what to do, get on your knees and pray
And He'll send His light to guide you

You start to wonder, "What's my purpose anyway?"
You feel alone in your big group of friends.
You search for peace, but you don't find it anywhere
You feel despair; you just want it all to end.

But don't give up, you'll find what you're needing
You are so loved; more than you can comprehend

When you can't find your way, just call on His Name
He'll be right there beside you.
When you don't know what to do, get on your knees and pray
And He'll send His light to guide you

March 11th 2008

Lovely (song)

2008-04-15T15:35:00.000-07:00

The Father waits for her to come,
Arms open wide, eyes full of love
He says, "Come to Me, beloved one.
"Feel My embrace; you're not alone."
But she doesn't hear. She doesn't know;
She doesn't think she's beautiful.
She doesn't know that she is worth
Much more than anything else on earth.

She's lovely, her Daddy's girl
His little princess; she's the centre of His world.
She's lovely, His Sweetie Pie
She is the apple of her Daddy's eye

Her Lover stands, His eyes aglow
Watching her live on earth below
She thinks, "There must be more to life than this!"
He just wishes she could taste His kiss
'Cause she needs to know; she needs to see
How close to her He wants to be.
She needs to feel the burning fire
Of His love for her; she is His desire.

She's lovely, His spotless bride
He sees her standing by His side
She's lovely, in every way
She grows more beautiful day by day

You need to hear, you need to know
Your Father made you beautiful.
You need to know that you are worth
So much more than anything else on earth.

You're lovely, so beautiful
Outside and in your heart and soul
You are lovely; God made you so
And He just really wants you to know.

February 6th 2008

My Soulmate

2007-09-25T17:57:00.000-07:00

I know not who you are,
Yet my heart is rapturous at the thought of you.
I know not what you look like,
But my mind sees you vividly.
I know not your characteristics or traits,
Still my heart thrills at the very idea of spending a lifetime loving you.

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Now playing: Destiny's Child - Girl
via FoxyTunes

The Experience

2007-09-24T23:02:00.000-07:00

Silence fills my ears
Nothing is all I hear
Daylight fades to black
There's no turning back
Then I feel myself falling
And I hear myself calling
Suddenly, nothing.

Slowly I blink my eyes
I look around with surprise
I'm blinded by the purest light
I behold a wonderful sight
I can hear the angels singing
And a hallelujah chorus ringing
Then, He's before me
And everything else fades away...

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Now playing: Enya - A Day Without Rain
via FoxyTunes

Alone

2007-09-24T22:56:00.000-07:00

I am alone. Very alone.
I stare up at the vast, empty sky,
And think aloud; "Is this all there is to life?"
I walk through the silent woods. I am alone.
Utterly and completely alone.
Not a bird is chirping, not a squirrel is scampering.
My heart longs to be filled.
It is crowded. I am standing amidst a thousand people.
Still, I am alone; dreadfully alone.
My soul is screaming, but no words reach my lips.
At last, I manage a feeble utterance, "God, help me!"
Suddenly, I'm not alone.

My Beloved

2007-09-20T22:03:00.000-07:00

My Beloved

I know that you have become weary and feel the weight of the world on your shoulders. Come to Me and I will give you rest. Bring all your anxiety and fear to Me and leave them with Me. I will keep you in perfect peace when you keep your mind on Me and trust Me. I care about you.

Know that I have given you My peace. I do not give to you as the world gives... and takes away. So do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid. I will fill you with joy and peace if you will trust in Me.

Instead of dwelling on confusion and anxiety, present your concerns to Me in prayer. And be thankful. Then let your mind dwell on things that are true and noble, things that are right and pure, things that are lovely and admirable ~ all that is excellent and praiseworthy. And the peace you will have ~ My peace ~ you will not be able to explain to others. No one can understand it, but you can have it.

Live your life according to My instructions, and I will be with you; because I am the God of peace, My peace will stand guard over your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

Annonymous

Feelings

2007-08-13T23:28:00.000-07:00

My heart aches; my soul yearns for that one who will be there forever.
The one who will be by my side through the good times & the bad, through times of happiness & times of grieving, through seasons of boredom & of uncertainties. My body longs, yes aches to be touched; embraced; held.
My heart desires to be loved, and to love in return with a love that never dies. My hands quiver with anticipation & desperation when I think of my love coming for me. Where is this one whom I love with my whole heart? Let me find him quickly! Let him come to me!
August 13th 2007
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Now playing: Enya - A Day Without Rain
via FoxyTunes

Poetry From Past Years

2007-08-13T23:07:00.000-07:00

Some poems I wrote a while ago...

El Shaddai
Eyes blazing like the hottest fire,
Feet like burnished bronze.
A double-edged sword coming out of His mouth
As He speaks into the beyond.
Head and hair; white as wool.
He wears a sash of gold.
His face shines like the bright noon sun;
A strong face- kind and bold.
His voice like that of water flows,
The sound so rich and sweet:
Like a waterfall, or ocean tide,
With water oh so deep.
A beautiful fragrance can be sensed
Whenever He is near.
And with those feet of His, so swift and sure,
He can run, and run, just like the deer.
So beautiful a man is He,
To see Him in His place;
Enthroned in awesome majesty,
With mercy, love and grace.
When you look upon His lovely face,
Are you filled with dread and doom?
If you are, prepare your heart;
For behold; He's coming soon!!
June 8th 2004

Her Daddy
The Father held her in His arms;
Keeping her safe from all harm;
She wasn't really all that smart;
But she had a real enormous heart.
Kids at school would laugh and yell;
'She's retarded, can't you tell'?
She'd just smile when insults they'd hurl;
And say 'I'm Daddy's little girl'.
She tried to tell them of His love,
They wouldn't listen though;
They didn't believe in God above.
She was special,
The other kids couldn't see;
But it didn't matter to her,
She'd just be all she could be.
That's all she could do,
And all that Daddy would want.
You see, God was her Daddy,
So it didn't matter to Him,
Whether she was retarded or not;
He still loved His little girl;
He really loved her alot!
Then one day while walking to school,
She thought it would be pretty cool;
To see the birds in the park out yonder,
So she went off track and began to wander.
She stepped out onto the street,
Not seeing two cars about to meet.
The two cars crashed with her in the center;
This was much more than a fender bender.
The little girl wasn't in any pain;
Her Daddy was there,
And He took her away.
Now she's safe in His arms,
Not knowing any harm.
Her time had come,
And now she's at home;
With her Daddy.
December 27th 2006

Saved
He smiled at her, and she saw tears in His eyes.
She felt she was the one who was going to cry.
She had just given Him her life,
Now He was in control.
Wherever He went, she wanted to follow.
As she walked down the street,
She wanted to tell all she'd meet;
Of the wonderful Person she saw;
When she looked at Him, she was filled with awe.
She had been about to jump off a bridge,
Over a river by a mountain ridge.
Then, she jumped; eager to end it all,
When Someone caught her and broke her fall.
She stared at Him with fear in her eyes;
He looked so sad; like He was about to cry.
He said to her, "please don't be scared.
I was with you when no one else cared."
As He held her, she told Him about her fears.
When she was finished, He wiped away her tears.
All of a sudden, she felt so good.
He'd made her feel better than any drugs would.
She knew exactly what she had to do;
Forgive herself, and ask Him to forgive her too.
"All's forgiven my daughter", He said.
All at once she was safe in her bed.
Was it all a dream, she wondered and wondered.
Then, she'd remembered how that day she had blundered.
Right away, she again saw His face.
No, it hadn't been a dream, she had been in that place.
Now she knows, that He is always there,
Holding her in His tender loving care.
Now, she can talk to Him, and tell Him her fears,
And He'll quietly whisper into her ear:
"Always remember that this is true;
You'll always be mine, and I'll always love you."
June 8th 2004

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Now playing: Enya - A Day Without Rain

Not Alone

2007-08-12T22:46:00.001-07:00

So, this is my first blog... Basically, I'm gonna do what my header says; just use this as a place I can vent or post songs or poems I write.
Below is a song I wrote recently after going out with a couple of friends who make up the 'Heartbeat Street Team'. These women go downtown in the evenings and pretty much walk around talking to and making friends with the street people there. It was a pretty amazing experience being with them this one time, and just watching how the people trust and open up to them.

Not Alone

Hopeless, helpless, all alone
Feeling worthless, so far from home
No-one around to show they care
Nobody asks how you got there

Wandering, aimless through darkened streets
Nameless, faceless, like most you meet
No-one looks up & sees your tears
Nobody around to calm your fears

But you are not alone
There is One who cares
Just run into His arms
You will find healing there

Wondering how you fell so far
Who you should be isn't who you are
It really hasn't been that long since
It seemed so right; how did it go so wrong?

But you are not alone
There is One who cares
Just run into His arms
You will find healing there